Memory and Messages

I found this concept interesting because I personally have difficulty with my memory. The textbook sates that everyone in good mental health has two types of memory: Short term and long term memory. Short term memory is our working memory that lasts from one to sixty seconds. During this small window of time our mind decides if the incoming message should be preserved or dismissed. Short term memory faces the challenge of external and internal noise competing for position. Long term memory however is a place that requires granted access. The text says that often times we hear something several times before it is granted entry into our long term memory. My memory problem is not being able to quickly gain access to long term memory, but in retrospect it may just be that my short term memory had too much external or internal noise, and the complete messages have never made their way in so I has scattered bits of information stored in my long term memory.

Selective Attention

The text describes selective attention as one of the four components of listening. Selective listening is when one message is chosen over another. There are a few reasons one engages in selective listening.
1. Some things are more important than others.
2. We are more likely to listen when the content supports our point of view.
3. Messages contradicting what we believe are likely to be rejected.
4. Expertise or understanding can decrease interest in other viewpoints.
5. Difficult material may be ignored.

For example just earlier this month my co-workers and I had a meeting with all of our fellow campuses to hold a staff meeting. Now in just the time I have worked there I have attended five of these meetings, and they are all exactly the same. The same boring PowerPoint, the same boring lectures, the same boring snacks, the same boring location. Quarter after quarter, year after year the same boring meeting. When I attend these meetings I usually zone out on whatever else I have going on. I usually sneak use of my iPhone during the really boring parts. This meeting was set to have new fun speakers and activities, so I showed up ready to be wowed, and found myself hearing and seeing the same things all over again. The was I overcame my selective listening was to step away from the group and go to the ladies room. I washed my hands and took a deep breath and prepared myself to go back and engage myself in the communication. When I went back in I sat up and focused on the speakers, and followed along. I knew the information but I still listened. Once the meeting was over I actually had gleaned some information that would be useful in my day to day work habits, so in actuality there was some new fun stuff, but I was too busy being negative Nancy to realize at first. Once I recognized my lack of interest and made the attempt to change my actions I started to benefit from the meeting. 

Semantics and the Hilarity of Ambiguous Interpretations

Semantics is a concept that I am studying very closely this semester. I am also taking a non verbal communication course and the textbook has semiotics in it's title, so I am learning quite a bit about it. The text states that semiotics is divided into three principles. The first principle being that meanings are in people not in words makes me think of texting, and how translations are lost on people. A simple meaningless text can be interpreted as being rude, or coming across in a manner that is not consistent with what may actually taking place. Second is that language itself is symbolic and words are used as representation of an item with context. The text uses grades as an example and how they show achievement within our lives. Third language conveys meanings of observations, inferences and judgements. Meaning that judgements are concluded upon based upon facts given.

The table on page 96 in the textbook was awesome to read and to share. I read it and laughed and laughed. Then I took the book around my work and read it to other people and received many different reactions. Most people laughed with me, but some people simply didn't understand what was funny, and after I explained to them what was comical they stated something along the lines of  "you are reading too much into it", but the idea of something being lost in translation is real and has meaning within communication.

Proxemics and Chronemics

The concept of Proxemics is used in communication to study how we use space while we communicate. Everything from sitting and standing while speaking with someone to seating arrangements. Different seating positions are described as power spots. The dominant position is at the ends of rectangular tables. When I was growing up this seat was always reserved for the grownups (the head of the table), and now that I am an adult I seek this spot out whenever I get a chance because I know I will be able to see everyone and make eye contact without sitting in an uncomfortable position.
Chronemics is the study of the use of time within communication. This concept studies promptness and whether or not it is largely important to the group. In Western culture time is important and is seen as "time = money", but I have seen many American people act careless to their punctuality. I have also seen other cultures display a lack of concern for time frames, and it is typical for their cultural upbringing. I have a Vietnamese friend that was horrible at being on time or following his own time constraints that we started using the term "Ken time". As in how long did he say he was going to be? Twenty minutes? OK that's an hour in Ken time. We compensated for his lack of time concern to help the function of our group.

Inconsistencies and Interpretations in Nonverbal Communication

The text says that when our behavior is inconsistent with the things we say people are more likely to believe the behavior. For instance if I was to tell people how great my work ethic was and how much I was a team player and then went and called in sick constantly people would more than likely think I do not have a strong work ethic contrary to what I say. This is important within communication because when working with a small group one must make sure they are following through with the things they say because there are others depending on consistency. It is important to be a contributing member of the small group to effectively establish your desire to be apart of the group.
The text also says that our interpretations of group members is guided by the context and power relationships. Meaning that each individual detail about the group (social setting, size, background) influence our interpretation of events that take place. For instance I wouldn't expect a co worker to come up to me and adjust my clothes or fix an out of place hair they way I would expect a friend to, and this behavior would be interpreted as pushy or awkward where if it was a friend I would be thankful.

Assumptions and Stereotypes

Chapter five discussed the concept of assumptions and stereotypes in great detail. What I found most interesting is the belief that we learn our automatic and perceptual responses to our surroundings from those who nurture and care for us. I agree with this concept because while I work with children I see first hand how their parents play a huge role in their social development. I see things such as children that believe because they are vegetarians that the people who do are "evil", and children who will mock fast food workers. The flip side is the children who have a good grasp on the world and make decisions based on their limited experience, but non the less develop their own interpretations of their world. I agree with the text about stereotypes being damaging and perpetuates myths about people and cultures. By perpetuating the stereotypes we limit the multi faceted perspective of those around us.

Small Group Feedback Guidelines

When providing feedback to a small group there are 10 guidelines one should adhere to in order to provide the best verbal or written feedback.

First be sure to avoid generalizing. Try to avoid wordiness such as good job, or terms like well done. By being as specific as possible you can provide more concise feedback.

Second focus on behaviors that can be changed. Try to isolate behaviors like procrastination and avoid nitpicking behaviors that cannot be changed. 

Third do not debate or argue with the group. An observation is meant to be useful to the group. Being an effective observer carries the expectation of separation and not using the small group experience as a forum for your own ideas or suggestions.

Fourth try not to micromanage the group process. It is not necessary to capture every detail of the group process rather focus on a few things and develop them well.

Fifth remember your role as an observer. Be aware of how your comments can enhance the group, and avoid statements involving like or dislike.

Sixth honor the positive aspects of the observation. Start your feedback with the positive and spend time finding the things that the group did "right".

Seventh end the observational feedback with specific suggestions for improvement in the group.

Eighth make sure you are clearly delivering your ideas verbally or written to the group.

Ninth is essential to the emotional well being of the group members. Compliment the individuals in public, and criticize in private. This is a common rule of thumb within professional settings, and should be transferred over into small group settings as well.

Last but not least the tenth guideline for providing feedback is to remember that the feedback process is intended to develop the skills within the group and improve their cohesion.

An Outsider Looking In

Chapter 14 states that there are four ways of obtaining feedback that can help to improve a groups future success. The first is by reading about groups and teams, but this offers no practical experience. The second method is to participate in a small group, and although we will learn through experience we may be limited in our evaluating abilities because of our engagement in the activities. The third is to obtain an external evaluation and advisement because it can be a useful addition as long as the observer is well equipped to provide effective feedback. The last source of gaining valuable insight into your group is through personal reflection and analysis. The text suggests a combination of all of these four techniques to provide the most comprehensive view for a thorough and beneficial evaluation.


I think these techniques are definitely beneficial and if followed through with you can ensure that the group is getting a non biased observation and that there is no distractions taking place and crucial information is not being overlooked as a result. In my own small group experiences I find that when I am involved in the group process there is unavoidable distractions and unconscious biases that may manifest, and by having a third party give an interpretation that has no inside influence or personal baggage is more beneficial to the further success of the observed group.